2008

April 7, 2008

Sweet Maryn,

Daddy summed it up so well on your blog when he said:

I'm so happy and yet devastated at the same time. I love you so very much, and time is passing by so very fast, it seems!

You are such a big girl. You are so incredibly smart and creative. I've always known you were smart. People have always made comments about your intelligence since you were very small: you'd lay in your crib and amuse yourself rather than crying; you've always watched people very closely and quietly; you ask questions that are so surprising and "deep". But the creative side of you is still a recent thing, and it's so fun to watch. Your Granny is so creative, I'm somewhat creative (although it fades more and more from lack of practice), and your mommy is very creative, yet doesn't give herself much credit. Suffice it to say that you come by it honestly, and it's wonderful to see it. I hope we continue to support you in developing that part of you. I say "we", but I'm very thankful your mommy has taken the lead there (after all, I can't stand to see Play-Doh of various colors all glumped into one brown color!)

There are so many times when you catch us off guard by the things you notice and the things you say. The other day we were watching the new movie Dylan got on his birthday, Alvin and the Chipmunks, and they were singing the very famous Christmas song about loopty loops and hoola hoops. Several hours later in the car you asked what the third one wanted. You had clearly been mulling this over for hours and finally wondered aloud that one wanted the plane, the second wanted a hoola hoop, but what did the third chipmunk want. I had never really considered this question and after thinking on it really had no answer. Another day later, you decided that the third one wanted to give a gift to God instead of asking for something for himself.

At your age, you daily teach me to look at things in new ways. And I venture to say that as the years pass that you will continue to brighten my horizon of thought to see the world in new and exciting ways.

You are constantly surprising us by doing the unexpected. It seems your nature to do this. Sometimes this can be pleasantly surprising and other times just plain perplexing. For instance on your birthday, Daddy and I brought you your breakfast in bed of a Strawberry Donut with sprinkles, as we sang you kind of grimaced and rolled over. The week and morning before leading up to this new tradition of ours you were very excited but instead of expressing this excitement in the moment you decided to go your own road and completely ignore us. Let us just say that you are definitely not a morning person!

You are doing so fantastic in school that we worry very little about your survival in Kindergarten. Your intelligence has never been a question to us. Socially you have turned a corner this year and have become a budding leader among your group of friends. This is wonderful and on occasion can be source of trouble for you. In the week before your birthday, the excitement of all the activities that were coming seemed to push you into overload and I am not sure you knew how to handle it all. For the first time ever, I was getting reports of you having pushed one of your friends, and snatching things away from another. Your explanation for this is that you did not want them to get in trouble. You had turned yourself into the classroom police. The teacher is telling me that you and a group of friends have begun to exclude yourself from the rest of the class and decide amongst yourselves that listening to the teacher is of little importance compared to the task at hand which is probably planning your next sleepover or ice cream social. It seems everyday when I pick you up you have planned for one of your friends to come home with us, or have decided that we can go to someone else’s house to play. We have been in a process of explaining how things work to you and that you cannot just take your friends home without their mommies or daddies knowing about it. And that parties and planning take a little forethought. But in your mind you want it to just be. You want to say, “ice cream party at my house”, and then everyone can just magically show up and have the time of their lives! Maybe I need to be a little more open to investigating a new approach to things. Maybe more of an openness to just let things happen this way rather than planning and planning and planning until you feel numb to it all would be a better way to go.

I love watching you mature socially. Anywhere we happen to be, you find a friend. And this friend of yours becomes an instant friend that you want to see the next day and the next. I am anxious to see how God uses this ability in you throughout your life. I am excited to see what happens when you start Kindergarten this fall. I pray that God guards you and uses you to show others who may not know Jesus the power of His love.

There are some big life lessons coming your way as you grow and I hope and pray above anything that I am able, through God, to successfully instill in you the importance of being yourself and listening to the Holy Spirit inside of you, despite what others around you may be doing. I know that if you have a strong sense of God’s Holy Spirit you will be safe, strong, and mature against anything that comes your way in life.

My Favorite Memory:

This happened yesterday while we were shopping for some spring clothes. We went to a store after dinner and you were just dancing and twirling through the store. Picking out your own clothes for the first time. You were an angel. Your ability to just be free overwhelmed me and made me so thankful to be there witnessing your happiness and your spirit. From the store floor to the dressing room, you had turned into a rock star and were totally jamming to the music. I could have sat there for hours watching you dance and try on clothes. You are so, so precious and I am beyond thankful for you every single day!

M.A.D.L.Y

2007

April 7, 2007

Sweet Maryn,

My goodness my sweet little princess. So much has changed for you this year! The most major transitions to being a big girl were getting rid of the paci and learning to go potty. Both of which were much less traumatic than I was expecting. The paci I was really ready to see go. I searched and searched to find the best possible way to make this happen. I came across a story called “The Paci Fairy”. The concept was that the paci was ready to go home and when you turned a certain age, you would put the paci on the window sill and the paci’s mommy would come down while you were sleeping and take paci home to be with his family that missed him so terribly and leave you a gift for being so brave. This did not appeal to your sensitivity at all!! I printed out this story, complete with little pictures of paci’s that we colored. We read, and read this thing, but never did it click that YOUR paci really wanted to go home. I mean how much more fun could he possibly have than right there with you! So we changed direction and shortly after your 3^rd birthday, we decided to put together a gift bag for you to take to school and give your paci’s to the babies in the infant room. This totally worked and your first night and every night thereafter went paci free with ease!!!

The potty training was just as easy, thankfully! We had tried everything from charts, stickers, candy, incentives, every 2 hours, special dolls. And it simply came down to getting naked. We picked a weekend and said goodbye to pull-ups. You held it as long as you could and I could tell you were getting frantic moving around sporadically. You knew you had to go, but was not sure what to do. You finally peed all over the floor and totally freaked out! It was clear you never wanted that to happen again because you were trained at that very moment. You have had very few accidents, usually during nap or sleep times, but really have done so well. Mommy and daddy are so proud of how much you have grown this year.

I have now been working for a year and I still miss you just as much as I did my first day. I do enjoy working and I have seen you grow so much socially this year with all your friends and teachers. My fears of you getting hurt came to pass, as I am sure it does for most parents, when a clip board fell on your face and gashed your nose sending you to the ER for 4 stitches in your nose. But you know what, you were so strong and so brave and I know everyone at school cares for you so much and I know you are safe there, which is a true comfort. I feel less confidant about the possibility of elementary school coming in the near future. We will cross that bridge when we come to it.

You crack me up so much at the end of the day. It seems your mind is going a mile a minute. A recent conversation with you went as follows:

Maryn: Mom, God will be mad at us if we do not share, right? (this conversation is sparked by the fact that Dylan does not want to share something with you)

Mommy: God loves it when we share with others, but he does not get mad at you.

Maryn: But, he wants us to share.

Mommy: Yes, God gets happy when he sees us sharing our things.

Maryn: Blood in our body is good.

Mommy: Yes, it is.

Maryn: I like cake.

You could really go on like this all night. We sit at the dinner table trying to talk to you about this or that, but it is like there is a wall and you are sitting behind it with your thoughts racing through and you hear and see nothing that is going on on the other side. And the questions!!!! The questions never end! You are constantly wondering about every detail of this world you are in.

This year you have really developed a wonderful imagination. You love everything princess and you are so artistic. You can sit down and draw things that simply amaze me. You have the sweetest laugh and the most beautiful smile I have ever seen. You have developed this sweetness that is, at times, so inclusive of Dylan. Wanting to play with him and draw him in to your imaginative world. I love being able to talk to you in a more mature way than ever before. You are so incredibly smart and simply interested in everything. This August you will be starting pre-K and I know the years will begin to fly by with school and activities. My constant prayer is that God will show us how to guide you to find God’s strength within yourselves and to never let another person determine your worth in this world.

My favorite memory:

My favorite memory this year has to be your first dance recital for Christmas. I was not at all sure how you would react being on that big stage. As the curtain opened I could feel my hear pounding anxiously. I saw your shining face, and when you saw me sitting there you just smiled so big and waved. You were an angel. Singing all your songs and remembering your moves. I totally loved it and was so proud of you!

M.A.D.L.Y

2006

April 30, 2006

Sweet Maryn,

I had your birthday party with a little sadness this year. I found out a couple days before your party that I would be starting a new job. I went through periods of being excited and sad. So much of my sadness came from knowing I will not be with you all day. You are such a joy to my day. Just hanging out with you and having our little conversations. It makes me so sad to know that those conversations will be had with other people. In my mind I picture the worst. I see you getting hurt, scared, or just being sad and turning to look for me and I won’t be there. That breaks my heart. I know I will greatly miss you, but I also know that being in school will be a great opportunity for all of us. For you to learn new things and meet new people and for us to have the extra income that will lead us to a better financial situation. I do hope I have made the right decision and pray continually that we all will feel the presence of God during this time.

I am writing your birthday letter late because once I started working things got really crazy. My first week at work everyone was sick. Dylan spent most of the birthday party this year throwing up and the rest of us followed suit in the coming days. Poor daddy really got put through the ringer staying home with you guys and catching your puke and comforting you while mommy went to my new job. It was quite a week. But, now several weeks later you are doing so well at school and enjoy going and being with your new friends and your teachers.

You are so wonderful and I love you so, so much! You have your days like every small child, but you are generally so pleasant and fun to be around. You are smart and charming and daddy and I just adore hearing you sing and make up stories. You are a fantastic big sister who takes great pride in making Dylan “feel safe”. At school when you hear him crying the teachers tell me you go over to hug and kiss him. He knows you are there for him too. He is always saying “Where’s Maryn”? and in a crowded room will just light up so bright as soon as he sees you. I adore you both so much!

So far this year, you still use your paci at night time. You are not allowed to take it to school and you are sleeping there without it. The plan was to get rid of it when you turned three, but with everything going on it just didn’t seem fair. Potty training is still a work in progress. I am hoping being in school will help speed up this process. I know the time will come right now we are just trying to focus on you feeling as loved as we can and making it through this transition with as few bumps along the road as possible. So far, I have been so impressed with your bravery.

Notes (2 years to 3 years):

April 8, 2005:

1. Someone sprinkled you with 2-year-old dust while you were sleeping – major meltdowns.

2. Trying to dress yourself causes bouts of uncontrollable screaming.

3. “Mercy-Me’s” – In an attempt to potty train I got an old pan with some magnets for you to play with. Most of the time Dylan was in there trying to play with you too and you would just start screaming and I would just say “mercy me”. You thought this is what the magnets were called so when you sat on the potty you would ask for your “mercy me’s”.

4. Our perfect sleeper is starting to test the boundaries and become defiant at naptime and bedtime. We started using a timer and it seems to work. At the end of the year we still use this method to gear down for bedtime.

5. “Twinkle, Twinkle” – perfectly word for word. The sweetest sound to hear your sing!

6. Balancing on one foot and loves dancing to “Ralph’s World”.

End of May:

1. Scared to poo-poo. You and Dylan were playing outside naked one day and you came inside in just enough time to poop on the floor. You were so terrified. This was a big set back on the potty training front. You wanted nothing to do with the potty and would not run around naked at all anymore. You wanted a diaper on at all times. We even had to give a bath with your diaper on twice because you were so hysterical.

2. No more kisses or hugs. L

3. Mommy and daddy decide we are going to have to tough it out with bath. A couple weeks of having to hold you in the bath while you cried hysterically and it was over.

June:

1. 6-3-05: Paw-Paw passed away. You and Dylan stayed with Uncle Ben and Aunt Jamie to go camping while mommy and daddy went to Memphis to be with the family.

2. You and Dylan moved in together.

3. “Watch me”

4. “It’s okay Dilly, be patient, be happy”

5. “Mom…..dad”. Daddy really hates that you have already begun to call him dad instead of daddy. We believe you picked this up from Payton while you were with them.

6. “Do it by myself”

7. The terrible 2’s is no myth. Writing this now makes me laugh because you were so mild compared to Dylan. I am hoping his will pass as quickly as yours seemed to.

July:

1. Getting frustrated that Dylan doesn’t understand what you are saying. Especially, “no, I’m playing with this”.

2. Got over your fear of the slide.

3. You are so bright when it comes to understanding conversations. Your memory still amazes us when you recite movie lines and song lyrics. People comment all the time how well you speak for your age.

4. Defiance is starting to lighten up a bit.

August:

1. NEMO

2. Started going to church again, you love to sing the songs you are learning there.

3. Separation anxiety is setting in.

4. No turning back now – full conversations.

5. “What’s that”, “What’s his name”, “What happened”? what….what…what?

6. Mommy is the favorite right now. I will take it as long as I can get it!

September:

1. Mommy still rocks! I am on a roll!

2. Twins are here! Evan and Jacob Allen.

3. “Gonna be sad now”

4. Ice cream with Papa Bear. This means so much to him!

5. Getting better about separation issues.

6. *burp*…”I got milk”?...from Garfield. This really makes you laugh!

7. I hope you always show people who you are rather than just mirroring who they might think you are.

October:

1. Curse of the potty has lifted. Will sit but still not doing anything.

2. “Payton is my best friend”

3. Imaginary everything.

4. “Whadya say” x 1000 – making me crazy!

5. Makes up songs about loving ordinary things – “Aunt Kim is so silly and Belle goes woof-woof”. My personal favorite – “I love you so much – I do I do – I do, do, do, do”.

6. “Say trick or treat? No, I’ll say please”

November:

1. I miss being the only one who can understand you.

December:

1. So smart & beautiful. Communication skills amaze us! Psyched about Christmas but still want nothing to do with Santa Claus.

2. Loves singing Christmas songs and driving around to see the lights. We do this almost every night.

3. Polar Express!

4. Totally loves getting new clothes!

5. Christmas at Granny’s – really loved opening presents this year.

6. Animal tree a hit!

7. “Bibbety-Bop-Bop”

January 2006:

1. Favorite color – Brown?

2. Mommy asked you what character you wanted for your birthday party. You began to cry and said, “I don’t like carrots!”

3. Having a really hard time saying goodbye to the magic of Christmas.

4. Amazing memory and vocabulary.

5. “What are we doing after night?” You love to go and do.

6. Starting to treat Dylan like another person – talking to him and asking him questions to which he generally responds with “no”.

7. Saying the funniest things to Dylan – “come on, figure it out” To mommy after lunch: “Thanks mommy, it was great”. I could list a thousand things here; it seems everything you say is so clever and cute. Am I enamored?

8. Natural soccer skills emerging!

February:

1. First Snow!

2. “What did he say”, “What will you say”, “What will I say”, X a million.

March:

1. Foot injury keeps you and Dylan from being able to walk for a week and a half. Mommy trying to carry you both everywhere.

2. Song for Dylan: “I love my Dylan; I always do……love him!”

3. You have begun to read us stories….Dylan loves this.

4. Why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why……….

5. Such a good listener and helper. Pouty sometimes, but generally calm and mild mannered most of the time.

6. Likes the idea of being grown up.

7. Still not potty trained – claiming when you turn 3 is the day! I hope!

8. Loves all the animals and Grandmamma and Papa Bear’s.

9. Loves eating apples, singing and reading.

Favorite Memory:

It is from a memory that I didn’t even see, but hearing everyone talk about painted such a vivid picture in my mind that because I know you so well seems like I was actually there. Grandmamma usually has apples sitting out on her dining room table. You have taken a liking to eating one every time we are there. And man, you really eat them….all the way to the core! Papa Bear loves so much taking you outside to see the goats, horses, chickens and everything else when you are there. On this particular day you had gone down to the barn with your apple and Papa Bear. He said you just plopped right down in a bale of hay just munching your apple and taking in all the things around you when all of a sudden a chicken came walking out of the hay and scared the heck out of you. I think Papa Bear will be telling this story for some time. But I can picture you as clear as crystal sitting with your apple, long brown beautiful hair. You are just go precious and I love you so much!

M.A.D.L.Y

2005

April 7, 2005

Sweet Maryn,

Well, I am busted. I wrote your birthday letter early last year because I was just so excited and wouldn’t you know that you started walking a week before your birthday. So I am including it here! J

If I tried, I could have never imagined how wonderful this year was going to be. I think my biggest fear this year, with Dylan on the way, was that you were going to be neglected or feel left out in some way. Grandmama told me several times that you would not even remember a time without Dylan in your life. I know this is true, but I wouldn’t know what to do with the guilt. However, this never seemed to be the case. If anything, Dylan was the one on the floor amusing himself. I didn’t take into account the fact that you were so mobile and could go where you pleased, often times this being our lap. Your Daddy and I caught ourselves many times holding you in our lap and catching a glimpse of Dylan on the floor wondering if he felt neglected. I can only hope that as you are reading through your letters that you and Dylan both can feel in your hearts how much you were loved by us. I definitely stopped trying to be perfect this year, and gave up expectations of how things should be. Instead I tried hard to just be okay with things as they were and I have to tell you that having the both of you in my life has not been as hard as I was expecting.

You have been just so amazing with your little brother. Seeing you dote on him is the highlight of my day. There didn’t seem to be a time that you thought his presence was strange. I think the hardest part for me was being apart from you while I was in the hospital. You stayed with Granny and I thought about you every second, at least until the labor started! I missed you terribly during that time.

This year has been an amazing adventure of accomplishments for you. You, obviously, started walking. After that it just seemed like a flood. Every day brought something new. I absolutely love to hear you talk and sing. I love watching you dance and laugh. It just hits me like a brick wall to see what a big girl you are becoming everyday. Most people who see you seem surprised at how well you talk and the things you know at your age. You are such a smart little girl and we are often astonished at the things you remember. You could go to anyone’s house and weeks later you would say “papa owl” because he had an owl sitting on his fence, or “paw-paw dog” for his big dog, Max. We went to the zoo with Aunt Jamie and Payton. When we went to see the tiger, you just loved him. Fortunately, we were able to see him take a great big dump right before our very eyes. I really wish I would have just taken a picture of it because for weeks all you wanted to see was “kitty cat poo-poo outside”. You can easily name people from looking at pictures and you are great with memorizing songs and dance movements to go along with them. I could go on and on. Let’s just say we are simply amazed by you!

This year you have taken to watching movies. Your favorite came about during an ice storm. We couldn’t go anywhere, so we rented Garfield. After that day, I cannot begin to count the number of times we have seen that movie. I could be in the other room and know exactly what part of the movie was on by your commentary. After about a bazillion times we decided to purchase another movie, Bambi, which you liked equally as well. However now, you generally request to watch “Bambi Deer”, while Dylan is far more interested and content watching Garfield.

I mentioned in the last letter that I may have more to say about the mess of eating. I really don’t. I have realized after Dylan has come along, that you are simply neater. I never realized how neat until he recently started eating. I can only say I am thankful I have one neat one or else I would never leave the kitchen! You are so cute though when you are both eating, you will slide little things over for Dylan to have. You are just so adorable.

Don’t get me wrong though, ever day with Dylan is not all hugs and kisses. You have given your share of bruises! For the most part you are doting and kissing, trying to “hold baby”, but there have been rough times too. The first time you sat on him I was in the kitchen and Dylan was in his bouncy in the living room. You just crawled right in on top of him. Man that scared the day lights right out of me. It generally goes in stages. When Dylan started crawling, you thought he was your own personal pony. Every time I would peek in on you playing in your room you were sitting on him. I got to where I could tell by the sounds coming from your bedroom if you were sitting on him, tackling him, or had locked him in your closet. Now that he is walking you love to put your hands on his shoulders and walk behind him. This usually leads to him falling and then you laugh and tackle. I can tell you are so anxious for Dylan to be as mobile as you are and I cannot wait to see the two of you playing together through the next year.

I just can’t say enough about how great you have been this year. You are so loving and affectionate. I love getting big hugs and kisses from you! Daddy has been a special part of your year. With Dylan around Daddy has been doing a lot more with you so I can take care of Dylan. One habit that has stuck is Daddy putting you to bed. This is what you have come to expect. I think it is so sweet. When bedtime comes we all walk down the hall together. You kiss Dylan, and then me. Daddy takes you to your room to say your special prayers and I take Dylan to his. If you wake in the middle of the night because of a dream or not feeling well, Daddy jumps up like a flash to go take care of you. The general mumbling that all new parents go through like “again”, “I was just in there two seconds ago” has subsided and now become what is wrong and how can I fix it. It is really very cute. You have started referring to him as “my daddy”. You will say “look at that my daddy”, and “bye-bye my daddy”. I know he beams when you say that!

We are at the end of your second year now. We have yet to really begin potty training, much to the dismay of several relatives. And you still use your paci for sleeping. After doing much research, I have decided to believe the notion that “no child goes to kindergarten with a paci and diapers” and leave it up to you with some encouragement from Mommy and Daddy. I should also mention that you moved into your big girl bed without a single problem. It was a bittersweet day for Mommy and Daddy. Daddy still clung onto laying you down in bed versus letting you crawl in by yourself for a while.

Happy birthday my sweet little girl! Everyday with you has been such a blessing and I cannot wait to see how you progress over the next year. It seems like just the other day that I was writing your first letter. It really is sad to know that kindergarten really is right around the corner.

Notes (1 year – 2 years):

1. First fall off the sofa. Scary, but not a major incident.

2. First trip to the ER. Man, you just starting throwing up all over. Daddy and I just kept cleaning it off the floor when it dawned on us to get some kind of pan to hold by you! New parents can be morons sometimes! Daddy took you to the ER. You looked so sad and pale. Nothing was wrong and thank God you have not had any more episodes like that.

3. Lack of communication causes some irritability. You have gotten very good at pointing and helping Mommy and Daddy figure out what you want though.

4. Your worst moments by far have been teething.

5. You love to hold Dylan’s hand when we are in the car and you give him tons of kisses.

6. Special bye-bye. When you were learning to wave bye-bye you developed your own way of doing it. You just used your thumb and finger. Everyone thought that was so cute.

7. Big Move to Florida – 7/2004

8. Special “shh” when Dylan sleeps. Mommy and Daddy were trying to teach you to talk quietly while Dylan is sleeping by showing you the “shh” sign. Your own version was a full “farmer blow” with mouth closed, finger on one nostril and blowing out the other.

9. You make your rounds of night-night kisses, but Dylan always comes first.

10. At 14 months, you know so many words I have lost count, you love to dance, and go swimming in the pool. Dr. said you can eat anything, but I am pretty certain buffalo sauce is not one of them. This little discovery brought to you by your Daddy!

11. Bath Time Hugs. Whenever Daddy or I rinse the shampoo out of your hair (the barbaric way not by choice because you refuse to lie down anymore), the first thing you do is stand straight up and give a hug. We have learned to wear a towel around our shoulders. This habit has stayed with you this whole year.

12. Hurricane Charley – 8/13/2004- we rode that one out. You slept for the most part. Then after it was over, we went to Jacksonville to stay with some friends since we lost power.

13. Trip to Memphis, just you and Daddy.

14. Hurricane Francis – 9/4/2004- drove back to Jacksonville!

15. Hurricane Ivan – 9/11/2004. We took our first trip to the beach to see Aunt Jamie, Uncle Ben, and Payton in Myrtle Beach, SC.

16. Hurricane Jeanne – 9/26/2004- the final straw. We decide to move out of Florida.

17. At 18 months you are so pleasant, funny and smart.

18. Moving to Georgia – 10/29/2004.

19. Travel Buddies! You and Dylan have been so great during our many travels this year. It took us 10 hours to get to Myrtle Beach and we were just dreading how you guys would handle it. We got there with not a single complaint.

20. At 20 months you moved into your big girl bed so Dylan could have your crib, you are starting to repeat what we say and are better able to communicate your needs. You love animals and all the sounds they make. Santa Claus became the new enemy.

21. You got a tricycle for Christmas from Grandmama and Papa Bear. For weeks you would say “tricycle” perfectly. Somehow it turned into “tricycle-cycle-cycle”. I guess you like this way better. When you said it your tongue would go in and out of your mouth like you had a lisp.

22. You love to sing Winnie the Pooh, Twinkle Star, basically anything we sing to you can be repeated. For instance you loved to chant “boom shaka laka” and “millions of peaches, peaches for me, millions of peaches, peaches for free”. But, my personal favorite where your sad ABC’s. I used to sing them the regular way, and then you would say in your sad voice that you didn’t want me to sing it. So I started singing them in a sad voice and you loved it. From that point on your ABC’s would be sung in the saddest voice you could muster.

23. At 23 ½ months, you know all your ABC’s, and can count to 10 usually proceeded with some kind of jumping. You are doing plenty by yourself and I keep waiting for the terrible 2’s to present itself. So far, so good. You love it when Mommy climbs in your bed after your nap. I love it too, just lying there chatting with you. You’ve actually gone to the potty a handful of times and now you will have absolutely nothing to do with the potty.

24. At 24 months, you know most colors. You are jumping with two feet which totally fascinates you, you love playing in your new sandbox and swinging in the swing set Daddy built for you. You have learned that whenever you have something that Dylan wants to look at to immediately try to avert his attention to another toy of your choosing or run to the big green chair where he can not reach you. This is beginning to not pay off for you as time goes on and I am interested to see what will happen when he can no longer be bribed! One of your favorite terms is “no, no Dilly this is my (fill in the blank)”. You have taken claim to literally everything. “no, no dilly this is my poo-poo”, “no, no dilly this is my night-night”, “no, no dilly this is my time-out” and everything else including food, toys or anything attached to your body!

M.A.D.L.Y

2004

Journal of Maryn

6/7/03:

You have the most wonderful way of laughing in your sleep that no matter what I may be thinking of at that moment it completely disappears. It is such a beautiful sound. You have yet to master laughing while you are awake, but we have been blessed with a growing amount of smiles as the days go by. It makes me wonder what else you are capable of in your dreams that you have yet to master. Do you talk, walk, sing or dance? Who knows? But I do look forward to the days when that beautiful laugh feels our home every day. (Mommy)

7/8/03:

Last night you were lying on the ottoman with daddy’s legs on either side of you so you would not fall off. You started to pat his foot and grab his toes and we both just stared in amazement at the accomplishment. So funny, that these little things you are beginning to learn just takes our breath away.

I have started to read three books to you everyday and you will sit with such attention looking at the pictures and patting the book with your wee little hands. I love you so much!

You greet us every morning with beautiful smiles that just take my make me warm with love. You are starting to figure out the sounds you are able to make, but they are usually followed with looks of frustration.

(Mommy)

7/9/03:

Something magical happened today. You laughed for the first time. It was so beautiful and funny. Your daddy and I were cracking up. I was bouncing you in front of the mirror and you just started to giggle. I pray to hear that every day.

(Mommy)

7/16/03:

I was watching Dr. Phil yesterday and it was about bullies in school and how the effect the self-image of children in such a negative way that some of these children thought that they were worthless. I just wanted to say to you and pray that you never allow anyone to determine your self-worth. Always know that you are beautiful in every way and that you are the only one who gets to decide how you feel about yourself. On the other hand I pray that you also are able to find the beauty in others and not discount the differences of people. The differences that we all have are what make this world beautiful and I hope you will always know that and treat everyone with the love and respect that they deserve.

(Mommy)

7/17/03:

I have been practicing with you for weeks now on rolling over and today I put you on your back on the floor when you woke up from your nap. I went to the bathroom and when I came back you were on your belly! I didn’t even get to see you, but that is okay!! Yeah for my baby!!!

(Mommy)

8/6/03:

You had to go in for your 4-month shots this morning. I ache all over when you have this done. The pain of childbirth is nothing compared to the pain of watching you get your shots. It is truly heart wrenching and the worst is that I know you just don’t understand and I can in no way explain to you why. I take comfort in the fact that you will just not remember.

You have started laughing really well and it is the cutest thing. You have also found your feet! It seems whenever you are fussy that you reach down and grab your foot. I think it has become a comfort to you. You want to sit up so badly and whenever I put you in a seat you just jut your head forward. You give me a smile whenever I talk to you know even when you are not happy. Thank you for that and I am sorry about the shots. I would take them for you if I could.

(Mommy)

8/15/03:

Well sweet angel, it looks like mommy and daddy will be having another baby soon. So far, it looks like it is also due in April just like you. Our biggest fear is that we have had so little time with you that you will miss out on the attention you need. I promise you that we will do everything we can to make you feel special and loved. We are blessed to have another child on the way and pray that you will love this child and feel blessed to have a sibling so close in age to you. I read a poem that said we are not taking something away from you, but instead we are giving you a gift. I know that there is so much love in all of our hearts that none of us will go without. I love you sweet angel!!

(Mommy)